Let's Climb Blackrock Mountain

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Lansiron
Posts: 823
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Let's Climb Blackrock Mountain

Postby Lansiron » Thu Jan 31, 2013 5:41 pm

(( Reposted from the Rose boards. Chelody told Amalay, Lans' overachieving protégé, to get to the top of Blackrock Mountain without the use of flight and put a banner there. This is what resulted. ))

/look

Some kind of mystic recording device, left on the table at the Argent Dawn office in Stormwind's Cathedral District.

There are several of them.

What they contain is a mystery. The writing on the note sitting next to them is hopelessly illegible. The only words you can make out, written large on the bottom, are "LOVE, AMALAY"


/playback

LET'S CLIMB BLACKROCK MOUNTAIN

Image: Did...did Chelody think this through...?

Image

Image . o O ( That's not a challenge. That's a pile of rocks. A BABY could climb that thing. LAUGHING. Laughing baby. The whole way up. Huhhhh... )

Image . o O ( Well, I don't think she was trying to insult me. Naaww, she just doesn't...WAIT. )

Image: This is a test! Like those guys up at the monastery like to do. Start from the bottom. The root of the mountain. But the root of this mountain is....


About a month later...


Image

Image . o O ( Left at Gadgetzan, right at Nazjatar, keep going when you hit Telredor. Genise's magic map was kinda right... )

Image

Image . o O ( Aw, sweet! There really is a portal to the elemental plane of fire here! Nice setup. )

Image

Image: . . .

Image

Image: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH~~!!!!

Image: . . . ?

Image. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Image

Image . o O ( Man, that was wild. )

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Lansiron
Posts: 823
Joined: Fri Nov 14, 2008 6:45 pm
Location: Austin, TX
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Re: Let's Climb Blackrock Mountain

Postby Lansiron » Thu Jan 31, 2013 5:41 pm

Image

Image . o O ( Is this the material plane again? It burns sorta less.... )

Image

Image . o O ( Hokay, just gotta keep moving. )

Image: . . . !

Image

Image: Hey, what--!

Image: GWAAAAARRRR!!!

Image

Image: I don't have time for that.

Image

Image: Hey, uh...pardon me, which way is out?

Image: Heh.

Image: Out. The exit. The...the door.

Image: ...

Image: ...heh, heh, heh...

Image: Never mind. Oh, hey...

Image

Image: Hey! Hey man. You look sentient. Look, can you tell me--

Image: INTRUDER!

Image: What? No, I'm trying to leave, actually.

Image: You trespass on sacred ground, mortal! You must be purged, by the wrath of the Firelord!

Image: You mean Ragnaros? Uh, man, I got some...news...from like a year ago...

Image: Do not speak blasphemy! BLASPHEMER!

Image: NO I'M NOT!

Image: Flames take y-- what is that liquid? Hah, pitiful, you seek to quench --ow! Wha --OW!

Image: *wiping mouth* That's the stuff. So potent it sets fire....

Image: AAAAAGGGHHHH!! IS THIS WHAT BURNING FEELS LIKE!?

Image: ...on fire.

Image

Image . o O ( That was a sweet line. I think I'm getting into this hero stuff. )

Image: This is horrible! What kind of monsters are we!?

Image

Image: Alright, maybe that guy's friendlier. Yo! Man!

Image . o O ( Oh, for nether's sake, not one these...things...again... )

Image: I'm trying to leave, but everything looks the same around here. Can you -- HEY!

Image . o O ( Go away. Go. Away. Where's my stick -- oh, there. DIE. )

Image: Here we go again. *drinks*

Image

Image: AAARGH! What-- what the hell!?

Image: Jackass.

Image: YO.

Image: What--?

Image

Image: Been watchin' you since Hyjal. Yeah, that's right.

Image

Image: And I just wanted to let you know...

ImageImageImage: YOU CAME TO THE WRONG NEIGHBORHOOD.

Image: Um.

Image: Do it, Baron. Do it!

Image: Woof!

Image: Uh...do what, now?

Image: Check it out.

Image: I did it.

ImageImage: HE DID IT!!

Image: Did whaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGHHH!!

Image

Image: Never. Gets. Old.

Image. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Image: Ow. The hell did I get hit with...

Image . o O ( This ain't good. Just gotta move... )

Image

Image . o O ( It's actually kinda scenic. If you like lava. Or is this magma... )

Image: Whoah.

Image

Image . o O ( Crap, almost ran smack into that guy. )

Image: Oh, h-hello.

Image: Hey! Uh...you're not gonna attack me?

Image: Huh huh, not unless you want me to. Hee hee.

Image . o O ( ....umm... )

Image: Can you like...tell me the way out of here?

Image: Do you like magma? Magma is a mixture of molten or semi-molten rock, volatiles and solids that is found beneath the surface of Azeroth, and is suspected to originate from the Firelands. Besides molten rock, magma may also contain suspended crystals and dissolved gas and sometimes also gas...bubbles...hee hee.

Image: Oh...kayy...

Image: You have n-nice skin. You must take magma baths a lot!

Image . o O ( ....keep moving...keep moving...don't make eye contact... )

Image: I have a hot tub!

A great deal of jogging later...

Image: Third try. Hoookay. HEY, MISTER!

Image: The impure, you who are not born of fire and ash...

Image

Image: ...will make a fine sacrifice.

Image: Hrrrrgh. What is with you assholes!?

Image: Feast, my brothers!

Image: Hah! HA HA HA HA!! Oh, man...

Image: Why does it laugh, Harbinger?

Image: I just remembered that I'm hungry.

Image: A short-lived problem.

Image: Listen, you jackasses. I once trained by snatching roasting nuts out of a fire. Made me quick. Made me care less about fire.

Image: Then it made you a fool.

Image: No, it made me a FLYING ROASTED CHESTNUT FIST!!!

Image: It made you a flying wh---OW! OW! OW! OW OW OW HOW ARE YOU DOING THAT!?

Image: OW! IT'S BROKEN!
Image: IT'S ALL BROKEN!
Image: MY SPLEEN!
Image: MY EYES!! WHAT DID YOU DO TO MY---!!!!

Image: GHLRLGHGHLLK.

Image: RaaaAAAAAAGH!

Image: . . .

Image: . . . . . .

Image: . . . . . . . . .

Image

Image: ....haaaahhhh.

Image . o O ( Oh, shit... )

Image: Listen...

Image

Image: ...it wasn't my intention to do this in front of you. For that, I'm sorry...but you can take my word for it, they...uh...probably had it coming. When you grow up, if you still feel raw about it...I'll be waiting.

Image

Image . o O ( Yeah, I...think I handled that alright... )

Image

Image . o O ( Some kind of actual...construction. Maybe this is the right way.)

Image: . . .

Image

Image: . . .

Image: Uh. Er. Pardon. Just...um. Excuse me.

ImageImageImageImage: Indeed, madam.

Image . o O ( Jerks. )

Image . o O ( Harridan. )

An uncomfortable silence later...

Image: So I was thinking, I should just go right out and tell her that the dogs get to sleep in the bed, or she can just move right out if she doesn't like it.

Image: Seriously, bro, it's your place, your rules.

Image: I know, ri-- what...?

Image

Image: Great. More of you jerks. Let's get this done. HRAAAGH!

Image: It's THEM again! Guys, run!

ImageImage: Right behind you, big bro!

Image: ....hey, okay. That's fine.

???: GRRRRRRGGHHGHHHHHRHRHRHGHGHRL....

Image: . . . ?

Image

ImageImage: GRRRRRRR.....

Image: ...holy balls.

Image: RRRRROOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRR!!!!!!!

Image . o O ( Backing away, backing away, backing away. )

Image: Grrrrr.

Image

Image: Slow day.

Image: *scratches butt*

Image: Hey.

Image: What?

Image: Is this the way out?

Image: Yep.

Image: . . .

Image: What?

Image: That's it?

Image: Yeah, go on.

Image: Oh uh. Well, thanks.

Image: Hey, wasn't that thing why Lucifron came by just now screaming to raise the alarms?

Image: Yeah.

Image: Oh, wow.

Image: Almost shat myself.

Image

Image . o O ( More...building. )

Image

Image . o O ( Like, they had to make this really... )

Image

Image . o O ( ...ominous. )

Image

Image

Image: Hey.

Image: Hmm?

Image: Uh, nothing. Just wanted to see what this was.

Image: ...it's a forge.

Image: Oh, neat.

Image . o O ( These things are so weird. )

Image . o O ( I have no idea what I was going to ask. )

Image: Um, bye then.

Image: Goodbye.

Image . o O ( Whatever... )

Image: Hey, whoah.

Image

Image: What are you doing here?

Image: Hello, ma'am. Just a courier to one of the Alliance's, erm, "allies."

Image: You're pretty well-armed for a courier.

Image: Indeed. Have you seen what's down here, ma'am? One would be a fool not to come suitably prepared.

Image: Oh, yeah.

Image: Wait...did you just come from across that bridge?

Image: Yeah. I'm climbing the mountain all the way.

Image: ...I see. Well, do be careful then.

Image: Thanks man. You too.

Image . o O ( Adventurers. Hmph. )

Image

Image . o O ( "Allies", huh...wait, dwarves? )

Image

Image: Hey! Where am I? This...this isn't Ironforge, is it? Aw, man, this could be embarassing...

Image: No, no it ain't. Yer in Shadowforge City. Are ye one of those Alliance people?

Image: Hoh! Okay. Well yeah, pretty much.

Image: Hmph, I see...wait, are ye the one tha' came from the Core below?

Image: Yeah.

Image: Someone came round askin' for you -- called you "cute bandage girl". Went over tha' way.

Image: Uhh...thanks.

Image . o O ( ..."cute bandage girl"...? )

Image

Image: Um.

Image: Hee hee, we ran into each other earlier. Do you...do you need someone to protect you? 'cause it's, it's dangerous here. Huh huh.

Image . o O ( Oh, for the love of... )

Image

Image: This place is full of all kinds of bad guys and someone with pretty s-s-skin might get hurt -- and I'm a really nice guy, so, I can...where are you going?

Image: I'm leaving.

Image . o O ( SO CUTE AND VULNERABLE! )

Image . o O ( I need an adult... )

Image

Image: Did...I take a wrong turn...?

Image: WHO DARES DEFILE THE TOMB OF THE SEVEN SUMMONERS...?

Image: WAAAGH!

Image

Image: . . .

Image . o O ( What just happened? )

Image

Image: Hey. Man. I'm, like, seriously lost. And I'm being stalked by a giant lava man. Is this still Shadowforge?

Image: Yep.

Image: Can you tell me how to get out of here?

Image: Psh. Can't take the heat, I wager?

Image: Naw, that part's fine. I just need some direction. And a drink. Probably.

Image: A drink? Ye're staggerin' like a three-legged corehound, lass.

Image: Uggh, really? That means I seriously need one.

Image: If ye say so. Heh.

Image . o O ( This is just the happiest place on Azeroth. I wonder if fire elementals and dwarves n' shit hate how normal people have water everywhere, 'cause all this magma...hey, what --)

Image

Image: . . .

Image : . . .

Image: . . .

Image : . . .

Image: . . .

Image : . . .

Image: . . . !

Image

Image : Last keg. DIE, JACKASS!

Image: IT BURNS...SO...GOOD...

Image

Image . o O (This is bad...I'm actually starting to feel clear-headed. Wait, what's that...?)

Image: . . .!!!

Image

Image

User avatar
Lansiron
Posts: 823
Joined: Fri Nov 14, 2008 6:45 pm
Location: Austin, TX
Contact:

Re: Let's Climb Blackrock Mountain

Postby Lansiron » Thu Jan 31, 2013 5:42 pm

Image

Image: No, I'm serious. I could never pull off that look.

Image: Girlfriend, you got it goin' on. Just 'cause your arm is all like...uhm...

Image: Garrosh Hellscream dropped a magic doomsday bomb on it.

Image: . . .

Image: Exactly.

Image: That's rough, baby.

Image: But that's not the thing. See like, I've been hangin' out with like, all these pandaren, and they're all like, "You're too skinny!", and I'm like, "No way!", and then they're like, "Way!", and then I...

Image: Hey, brought us some more.

Image

Image: Oh sweet, thanks, but like, look at her! I mean, look at her.

Image: Me?

Image: See that's what I'm talkin' about. Those pandaren are right. I ain't got that.

Image: *snicker*

Image: Sweetie, we're all different. You gotta work with what you do got, you know?

Image: Yeah, I know...

Image: LAST CALL!

Image: Shit, I gotta get goin'...got the rest of this mountain to conquer, hah. HEY, BAR BRO!

Image: 'ey?

Image: One last round for these two on me.

Image: Comin' up!

Image: Ye got this, just watch out fer orcs an' dragons.

Image: If you run into my friend Lothos up by the Span, ask him, he can tell you how to get fabulous. Even though you totally already are.

Image: Aww, thanks! You know, you illidans ain't so bad either. See ya!

Image: Later, girl!

Image: . . .

Image . o O ("Illidans"?)

Image

Image . o O ( Aaaaalright, back in business. Feel so, so much better now! It's great having a chemical addiction, when you get to feel this awesome. )

Image

Image : WOOOOOOOO!!!

Image . o O ( Also great is everyone not trying to kill me on sight. )

Image

Image . o O ( Now I just...need to figure out which way I'm going...oh, hey... )

Image

Image: Wait, this isn't a map...this looks like...

Image: ...like...

Image: It's math.

Image: ...math.

Image: What did ye expect? Ye're in the science department, lass.

Image: Oh, whoah.

Image: Ye're lost. Take tha' hallway straight to the end and turn right.

Image: That's the way out, right?

Image: Aye, outta me way. Now go on, I'm tryin' ta do science 'ere!!

Image . o O ( Eesh. Say it, don't spray it ...nerd. )

Image

Image: Armory...?

Image: Still the science wing, actually.

Image: Ergh. Times been rough lately.

Image

Image: Is that...a silithyst crystal?

Image: Aye. Don't touch anything. What are you doin' here anyway? You one o' them Twilight berks?

Image: No. Ew. No!

Image

Image . o O ( Shortcut...? )

Image: GAH!

Image: Whoah.

Image: Ow...

Image: Sorry, didn't mean to sneak up on you like that. Say, are you one of those Twi--

Image: No!

Image: But--

Image: You didn't see me! Nothing to see here!

Image . o O ( Gotta lie low...can't have them find me yet...)

Image: Take it easy.

Image: I'M TAKING IT EASY!

Image: Because you look a little--

Image: I'M!

Image: TAKING!

Image: IT!

Image: EASY!!

Image: . . .

Image: Dude.

Image

Image . o O ( Don't make eye contact...don't make eye contact... )

Image

Image: Hey, you guys got your own Brawler's Guild down here?

Image: Naw. Used to, but we're out o' business.

Image

Image: Aww...it's that empty stadium feeling. So many fond memories of violence and pain and death.

Image: Been talk of startin' up a beast-fightin' league, though. Ye know, take two critters, make 'em mangle each other fer giggles.

Image: Sounds brutal.

Image: Ayup. Already sent some dumb kids out to round 'em up in little sphere-cages. Bet we'll make a fortune.

Image: Good luck with that.

Image

Image . o O ( Just keep walking...just keep walking...aaaaahhhh... )

Image

Image . o O ( Nice. )

Image

Image: Augh!

Image: GIT OUT!

Image: I'm in your house.

Image: Damn right, you are!

Image: I'm lost.

Image: Mom, what was that?

Image: I don't know, sweetie, but I hope she gets...some help.

Image: Professional help.

Image

Image . o O ( You know what's nice about this town... )

Image

Image . o O ( Everything isn't the same lame cave. )

Image

Image: Yo man, is this the way out?

Image: Yeh.

Image . o O ( Aw, yesss. Straight, two-way-only hallways. I'm good at these. )

Image

Image . o O ( Minding my own business. Nothing to see here. )

Image: Hey.

Image: AUGH!

Image: What?

Image: Hold still a second.

Image . o O (ohdearfirelordgreatfirelordwhatisitgoingtodotomeAAAAAAAAA~~~ )

Image *lights*

Image: . . .

Image: Thanks, bro.

Image

Image

Image . o O ( The magnificent gates of Shadowforge City in all their grandeur. I've found them! But what a view, right? )

Image

Image . o O ( Hey, wait... )

Image

Image . o O ( Oh, dammit, not again. )

Image

Image: H-hey.

Image: What are you doing here? Why are you following me!?

Image: Why are you friend-zoning me?

Image: Wh...what...?

Image: I'm c-cool!

Image: WE'RE NOT EVEN FRIENDS!

Image: . . .

Image: Wait, no, no. You know what you need?

Image: A cool sword? Maybe a fedora?

Image: No. No, not...no. Just no.

Image: But...those are...!

Image: Drugs.

Image: Drugs?

Image: Drugs.

Image: Drugs.

Image: You'll make friends and maybe stop being such a terrible goon.

Image: I...

Image: ...I'm going to go do drugs.

Image: Good luck.

Image

Image: "Okay, so doc, get this. I need more therapy. Because every time I see an enormous lava monster I think of unwanted sexual advances." I hope Shael has some advice for that...

Image

Image: Hey.

Image: Are you...lost, ma'am?

Image: Less so by the minute. What's all this...uh...drilling apparatus?

Image: They're shortcuts to parts of Shadowforge City. Why?

Image: . . .

Image *smokes*

Image: Awesome.

Image: . . .

Image

Image: . o O ( How the hell did they plan this place out? Were they digging a mine and decided they'd carve out a city underneath it, or...? )

Image

Image . o O ( The mountain had to be there first, right? )

Image

Image: Are you lost?

Image . o O ( Heh heh, I get to say it, this time. )

Image: Ja, mon. Not like, da where-I-be-goin' kind, just I don' got no idea what I been doin' wit' me life.

Image: I hear ya, man, I hear ya. Listen, take it easy.

Image: Da's da best advice anybody eva' give, 'cha!

Image *passes*

Image *smokes*

Image: Later, man.

Image: Latah.

Image

Image . o O ( More magma, but this... )

Image

Image . o O ( It's happening! I'M MAKING THIS HAPPEN! )

Image: Oh, hey!

Image

Image: Are you...

Image: Lothos "The Wardrobe" Riftwaker? That's me. Nagmara buzzed me to expect you, Miss Amalay Banderas.

Image: Rock on. So okay, hi, I need some advice.

Image. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Image

Image . o O ( Okay, so I have no idea how I'm gonna find someone who can put that together, but first things first. )

Image

Image . o O ( Get to the top of this mountain. Hey, is that...some kind of dog? )

Image

Image . o O ( Whatever. )

Image

Image . o O ( Okay, time to turn on the charm... )

Image

Image: Hi!

Image: . . .

Image: I have an order of "dreadbrew" for one...uh...

Image . o O ( ...crap, what was that name... )

Image: Crow...mage...er...

Image: Chromaggus?

Image: Yeah, that guy!

Image: . . .

Image: Khek. Okay.

Image: Thaa~anks!

Image . o O ( Stupid. )

Image . o O ( Stupid. )

Image

Image . o O ( Geez, this place is a dump. )

Image

Image . o O ( Can't say that isn't impressive, though. )

Image

Image: Hey! Uh...

Image . o O ( It's like the mountain has a slum. )

Image: Human.

Image: Um, yeah. What?

Image: Heh.

Image: I'm just delivering something.

Image: No.

Image: You came to the wrong neighborhood.

Image

Image: I've already heard that line.

Image: KILL THE HUMAN FILTH!

Image

Image: ...fine...

Image

Image

Image *sigh*

Image . o O ( I feel bad because I don't feel bad. )

Image

Image . o O ( Okay, now what the hell is going on in here... )

Image

ImageImage: STOP!

Image: Don't! Touch! Anything!

Image: Whuh...

Image: ANYTHING!

Image: We're busy!

Image: YEAH, WE'RE BUSY!

Image: ...what...

Image: You wouldn't get it.

Image: None of your business!

Image: YEAH, NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS!

Image: Bitch!

Image: BITCH!

Image: ...oh...kay...

Image . o O ( Chill the fuck out... )

Image: AAAAUGH! YEAH, KEEP DOIN' IT!

Image: DOIN' IT!

Image . o O ( This is the worst place. )

Image: WOO!

Image

Image: Hold it.

Image: What?

Image

Image: ...ooooohhhh.

Image: No sudden movements. Just go up the stairs and be on your way.

Image: You're not going to stop me?

Image: Why would we want to? We just do not want anyone charging through here like an imbecile.

Image: Who would do that?

Image: You mean you've never heard of --hm. Never mind. Let us say that you would be surprised. Now along with you.

Image

Image . o O ( You know what's great, is these panoramic views of complete squalor. Ugh. )

Image

Image: Shit.

Image: State your purpose, human.

Image: I'm visiting...uh, Chromaggus.

Image: ...huh, another one.

Image . o O ( Please don't ask me who Chromaggus is, please don't ask me who Chromaggus is...I swear, I just heard the name once... )

Image: Why didn't you just say so, in the lower holds?

Image: We heard about what happened.

Image: Because like, they jumped me with magic n' shit before I could say anything.

Image: Boo hoo. Keep movin', kid.

Image: Heh, you're gonna get eaten.

Image: Okay. Yeah.

Image

Image: Hey, any way through there?

Image: You have...business...?

Image: Yeah. My own.

Image: No need for unpleasantry. Hold a moment while I work the switch.

Image

Image . o O ( What's that...? )

Image

Image

Image

Image: You know, this place is really depressing.

Image: This? We're thinking of refurbishing it for that "pet battling" craze that mortals seem so enamored with.

Image: It's the same down in Shadowforge. Gotta roll with the times, right?

Image: Mm.

Image

Image: Thanks.

Image: Good luck, whatever your ill-conceived business here.

Image

Image . o O ( Hey, that looks significant, maybe it's the right way. )

Image

Image . o O ( Nope. )

Image

Image . o O ( Alright, seriously, we need to like...send charity here, or something. This place is a filthy hovel full of listless, withered war veterans with nowhere else to go. I'm actually like...like... )

Image

Image . o O ( ...like I got sadness. But...nothing to be done now... )

Image

Image . o O ( ...but keep moving... )

Image

Image: . . .

Image: ZUG ZUG!

Image: WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!

Image: Okay, whoah, whoah, stop, just what the F--

Image. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

User avatar
Lansiron
Posts: 823
Joined: Fri Nov 14, 2008 6:45 pm
Location: Austin, TX
Contact:

Re: Let's Climb Blackrock Mountain

Postby Lansiron » Thu Jan 31, 2013 5:42 pm

Image

Image: There we go. It's cleaned up. No one needs to know what was happening here.

Image: Thank you. For a pathetic mortal, that was handled well.

Image: No worries. Still gonna have nightmares.

Image

Image . o O ( Oh, man, something smells...rank...oh, what is tha-- )

Image: AUGH!

Image

Image: Who...what...what the hell!? Who just leaves something like this lying around!?

Image

Image . o O ( Oh...I can TASTE that stank. Oh man, I gotta... )

Image: *BARF!*

Image

Image: The hell is y'all's deal!?

Image: Oh, hello.

Image: You know you've got a rotting giant dragon carcass out front.

Image: We...do? Oh.

Image: Sounds like it's happening again.

Image: *sigh* I'll get the shovels.

Image

Image: . . .

Image: STOP! DON'T--

Image: I just need to get by. What's the--

Image: Meat...MEAT...

Image: !?

Image: I can smell your soul!

Image

Image: What am I looking at!?

Image . o O ( I say, for like the third time today... )

Image: Is someone tampering with the suppressors?

Image: You know that these things haven't been maintained in about five years. You know something was going to go wrong if anyone else wandered in.

Image: Kid, what are they doing to you!?

Image: They...they...mother, is that you?

Image: I feel heavy, mother.

Image: You, quiet down. You, who are you and what are you doing here!?

Image: I'm...

Image

Image: I'm here to kick your ass.

Image: This is none of your concern, human.

Image: Don't show me a bunch of kids driven nuts by whatever the hell and tell me it ain't my concern, you sick bastard.

Image: What I'm showing you is the door. I suggest you use it.

Image: Hammer, hammer, hammer...

Image: I don't think you understand. Some of my best bros are dragons. Including this one hot guy with a cool hat.

Image: What sort of idiocy are you babbling about?

Image: Yeah, so he's like two, and I dunno if that's legal in dragon years.

Image: No. No, I do not actually care. You're interrupting our work here. Get--

Image's Keg Smash hits Suppression Device for 135209 damage.

Image: Yeah, interrupt this.

Image

Image

Image

Image: *cries*

Image

Image: Oh! I get it now.

Image: Who are you?

Image: It's a science lab. That explains a lot.

Image

Image . o O ( I get the impression I shouldn't look too hard at anything. That didn't go well downstairs. )

Image: Do we kill the human, or does it even matter?

Image: Ha ha, no, just watch.

Image: Yeah, okay--

Image

Image: Whuh!?

Image: OH, PARDON ME, I DID NOT SEE YOU THERE.

Image: Oh, hey.

Image: YES. HEY. MORTAL, YOU ARE NOT ONE OF OUR MINIONS. EXPLAIN YOURSELF OR BE EATEN.

Image: I'm climbing the mountain. Is this the way up?

Image: YOU REALIZE, YOU ARE FAR OUT OF YOUR DEPTH, AND YOUR DEMISE IS IMMINENT.

Image: Look, guy. I dunno if you've been locked up in here for like a decade or something...

Image: . . .

Image . o O ( HOW DID IT GUESS!? )

Image: ...but you can't just be all like, "I'm a dragon", because that's not like...

Image: *drinks*

Image: ...not really a big thing. Because either everyone is a dragon, or rides one. Or saved one's life. Probably from a rampaging damsel.

Image: . . .

Image: You know how damsels are.

Image: . . .

Image: So yeah, lemme ask again -- is this the way up?

Image: ...YES. THIS WAY.

Image

Image: Thanks.

Image . o O ( I...I can't believe that actually worked... )

Image: Was that supposed to happen?

Image: I don't even know anymore.

Image . o O ( WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE. )

Image

Image: . . .

Image: . o O ( I want the psychotic fire elementals back. )

Image

Image . o O ( Hey, it's that... )

Image

Image : ...dog.

Image: BARK!

Image: Nuh...nice...!

Image

Image: *LICK*

Image: Oh! Augh! Aaagh! Okay, nice dog. Nice boy.

Image: *PANTS*

Image: Hey, you need a playmate. See that guy over there? See him? You see him!?

Image: YOU THERE, ORC. I REQUIRE AN UPDATE ON THE SCIENCE.

Image: WOOF!

Image: Hee hee, go get 'im!

Image: ?

Image: !

Image: BARK!

Image

Image . o O ( There! Now I can say I left this a better place than when I came in! )

Image: NOOOOOO!

Image

Image . o O ( Man, it is about time.... )

Image

Image . o O ( ...yep. )

Image

Image . o O ( Could just climb, but what... )

Image

Image

Image . o O ( Does that go...? )

Image

Image: This must keep going up. Wonder what--

Image

Image: . . .

Image

Image: . . .

Image

Image: . . .

Image

Image . o O ( Nope. )

Image

Image

Image . o O ( This, the easy part...? )

Image

Image

Image . o O ( Yeah, could have just done this the whole way, but...effort... )

Image

Image: Lonely kind of place...

Image

Image

Image . o O ( Huh, no handholds. Time to improvise. I saw Lans pull this off once. )

Image: ...and...GO!

Image

Image

Image: Hah.

Image

Image

Image . o O ( Another hundred feet of rock...what's the hurry, right? )

Image

Image

Image . O ( Something's weird about this whole place. No way that lava came all that way up, from the Core, given what's all in between, what I just climbed up...but then, what the hell do I know about geology? )

Image

Image . o O ( Or magic wizard mountains... )

Image

Image

Image . o O ( Heh heh. Weather. )

Image

Image: Here.

Image

Image

Image

Image *inhales*

Image

Image: And...

Image

Image

Image

Image . o O ( The best feeling. )

Image

Image

Image

THE END!


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